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THE

nec procu

The beating

PULSE

of the Golden Triangle 

THE

December 12th, 2019
BREAKING:
  • Report: 3 in 5 Golden Triangle adults now 'entirely reliant' on basket weaving as their primary source of income . . . .

From The Archive: Students – Welcome To The Golden Triangle

Our Helpful Guide To Students Moving Into The Golden Triangle

On behalf of all the the residents of the Golden Triangle, we extend a warm welcome to you and congratulate you on achieving mediocre ‘A’ level results  in a narrow range of humanities based subjects.

This simple guide will help you make the most out of your time here and prepare you for your life-long role as a middle ranking official at Aviva.

wilko2

Firstly Though . . .

. . . we will address the single most pressing topic for any student arriving at the UEA.

So then . . . . ‘Wilko’ is on the junction of Chapelfield Road and St Stephens . . . just here in fact  . . . .

 

Your Accommodation

Most student accommodation in the Golden Triangle is based in ‘terraced’ houses.

In Victorian times these houses were squalid, overcrowded, unbearably cold in winter and controlled by ruthless exploitative landlords. Fortunately for students however, here in 21st century Norwich, smallpox and rickets have largely been eradicated.

terraced housesIt’s important to understand the role of the Damage Deposit when renting a student property. This is an estimate of the cost of repairing items that are damaged during the tenancy – so if your Damage Deposit is high, you need crack on with smashing things up fairly early on in the first term.

You also need to be aware of any restrictions placed on you by your Tenancy Agreement –  for example the fridge in the kitchen is often ‘out of bounds’ for students as this is where the Landlord grows his mildew.

It’s not a bad idea to get to know your Landlord. Most are extremely enlightened and sociable, and almost all  would welcome students calling at their home addresses in the early hours for a little light badinage and a night cap.

TOP TIP
House plants need light . . . So remember to place the Spider plant that your Mum gave you near a window, so that local people can watch it die too.

 

Around The Triangle

The narrow terraced streets of “The Triangle” can seem like a confusing labyrinth at times, so a good rule of thumb is simply to turn RIGHT at every junction. Adopting this technique will always lead you back to The Mad Moose.

Ford And Yarham 2
Only 100 meters away from a “foot long steak-n-cheese melt”

Local greengrocers “Ford & Yarham” offer a superb selection of locally sourced fresh fruit and vegetables so use this shop as a handy landmark when you’re trying to locate Subway on Unthank Road.

And remember, if you start to notice cars without traffic cones on their roofs then you are almost certainly heading out of The Golden Triangle.

 

Miscellaneous

Striking up a conversation with non student locals is a great way to learn about the area and feel part of the community. A little known fact is that most GT’s routinely wink at each other as a sign of camaraderie and friendship . . .  and this is a great potential “ice breaker” for outsiders.

TOP TIP
Try walking up to a GT, wink confidently, and then say something like “Watcha cock” .  .  . you’ll be amazed at the reaction you get.

Next Week – More Tips:

Including: If you’re overweight and don’t like to party, we explain why it might be a good idea to change one of those things about yourself immediately.

Until next time . . . “Keep Winking

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